Ultimate List of Guardians Of The Galaxy Quotes

Ultimate List of Guardians Of The Galaxy Quotes | QualityComix

(Image credit: Marvel Comics)

The Guardians of the Galaxy movies have it all - hilarious dialogue, heart-wrenching moments and space battles galore, plus a certain super cute tree-like character we all know and love! Take a journey through the best quote-worthy lines and exchanges from your favourite unconventional heroes with the ultimate list of Guardians of the Galaxy quotes from Quality Comix, starting with the cutest plant in the galaxy! Let’s dive in!

 

I am Groot.

Groot

 


Ain't no thing like me, except me!

Rocket Raccoon

 


My name is Peter Quill. There's one other name you may know me by. Star-Lord.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


There are two types of beings in the universe: those who dance, and those who do not.

Drax the Destroyer

 


I'm sorry I didn't do none of it right, I'm damn lucky you're my boy.

Yondu

 


Well he don't know talkin' good like me and you, so his vocabulistics is limited to "I" and "am" and "Groot," exclusively in that order.

Rocket Raccoon

 


When you're ugly, and someone loves you, you know they love you for who you are.

Drax the Destroyer

 


Rocket Raccoon: We were only gonna blow you up if they didn't turn you over.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: And how on earth were they gonna turn us over when you only gave them a count of five?

 


Are you telling me that the fate of thirty million inhabitants is in the hands of these criminals?

Nova Prime Rael

 


Mantis: It's beautiful.

Drax the Destroyer: It is. And so are you.

Drax the Destroyer: On the inside.

 


If you don't hand over our companions now, he's gonna tear your ship a new one. A very *big* new one.

Rocket Raccoon

 


I saw you out there. I don't know what came over me, but I couldn't let you die. I found something inside of myself, something incredibly heroic. I mean, not to brag, but objectively…

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


I may be as pretty as an angel, but I sure as hell ain't one.

Yondu

 


I was only a kid when I left Earth, and I had no idea what the universe had in store for me.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Gamora: Your wife and child shall rest well, knowing that you have avenged them.

Drax the Destroyer: Yes. Of course Ronan was only a puppet. It's really Thanos that I need to kill.

 


Drax the Destroyer: You! Man who has lain with an Askervarian!

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: It was one time, man.

 


You will always be my sister.

Gamora

 


It is pleasing once again to have...friends.

Drax the Destroyer

 


Gamora: Nebula! Sister, help us fight Ronan. You know he's crazy!

Nebula: I know you're both crazy!

 


Why'd ya have it lick you like that? Gross!

Howard the Duck

 


You shouldn't have killed my mom and squished my Walkman.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Remember, boy. At the end of all this, I get the stone. You cross me, we kill you all.

Yondu

 


Ego: You can do anything you want.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: I'm gonna make some weird sh*t.

 


They crumpled my pants up into a ball. That's rude! They folded yours.

Rocket Raccoon

 


This gross bug lady is my new friend.

Drax the Destroyer

 


Yondu: You like a professional asshole or what?

Rocket Raccoon: Pretty much a pro.

 


Dance off, bro.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


In times of hardship, just remember: We. Are. Groot.

The Form of David Hasselhoff

 


Rocket Raccoon: So, we're saving the galaxy, again?

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: I guess.

Rocket Raccoon: Awesome! We're really gonna be able to jack up our prices if we're two-time galaxy savers.

 


Cease your yammering and relieve us from this arson confinement.

Drax the Destroyer

 


The crabby puppy is so cute. He makes me wanna die!

Mantis

 


Nebula: Look at you, a Garden of the Galaxy!

Gamora: It's Guardian! Why would I be a Garden of the Galaxy?

 


Drax the Destroyer: Finger on throat means death!

Drax the Destroyer: Metaphor.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: ...Sort of.

 


I know who you are Peter Quill, and I am not some starry-eyed waif here to succumb to your... your pelvic sorcery!

Gamora

 


Ninja Turtle, you better stop poking me.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


You need my what?

One Legged Prisoner

 


Korath the Pursuer: You don't look like a junker. You're wearing Ravager garb.

Peter Quill: This is just an outfit, man.

 


Let us put more of this liquid into our bodies.

Drax the Destroyer

 


Ego: Listen to me! You are a god. If you kill me, you'll be just like everybody else!

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: What's so wrong with that?

 


You're. Making. Me. Beat. Up. Grass!

Rocket Raccoon

 


I don't use my head to fly the arrow, boy! I use my heart.

Yondu

 


What if someone does something irksome, and I decide to remove his spine?

Drax the Destroyer

 


Once the battery is removed, everything is gonna slam into emergency mode.

Rocket Raccoon

 


You were the one who wanted to win. And I just wanted a sister! You were all I had.

Nebula

 


Nothing goes over my head! My reflexes are too fast, I would catch it!

Drax the Destroyer

 


Groot: I am Groot!

Rocket Raccoon: I know they're the only friends we've ever had!

 


Nebula: All any of you do is yell at each other. You're not friends.

Drax the Destroyer: You're right... We're family.

 


Drax: People usually want cute pets. Why would Ego want such a hideous one?

Mantis: I am hideous?

Drax: You are horrifying to look at. Yes. But that's a good thing.

 


Yondu: We're Ravagers, we got a code.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: Yeah, and that code is: steal from everybody.

 


It's an unspoken thing.

Gamora

 


Drax the Destroyer: This vermin speaks of affairs he knows nothing about!

Rocket Raccoon: That is true!

Drax the Destroyer: He has no respect!

Rocket Raccoon: That is also true!

 


When I look around, you know what I see? Losers....I mean like, folks who have lost stuff.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Ow! My nipples!

Drax the Destroyer

 


The Collector: These carriers can use the stone to mow down entire civilisations like wheat in a field.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: There's a little pee coming out of me right now.

 


I just wanted to tell you how grateful I am that you've accepted me despite my blunders.

Drax the Destroyer

 


Well, now I'm standing. Happy? We're all standing now. Bunch of jackasses standing in a circle.

Rocket Raccoon

 


I have lived most of my life surrounded by enemies. I will be grateful to die among my friends.

Gamora

 


What a bunch of a-holes.

Denarian Saal

 


Fine, but I can't promise when all of this is over I'm not going to kill every last one of you jerks.

Rocket Raccoon

 


Drax the Destroyer: Where did you learn to do that?

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: I'm pretty sure the answer is: "I am Groot".

 


I’m Mary Poppins, y'all.

Yondu

 


Groot: I am Groot.

Rocket Raccoon: Asleep for the danger, awake for the money, as per frickin' usual.

 


You don’t have to believe in yourself, because I believe in you.

Drax the Destroyer

 


Whatever nightmares the future holds are but dreams compared to what's behind me.

Gamora

 


No! No, that’s the button that will kill everyone!

Rocket Raccoon

 


He may have been your father, boy, but he wasn't your daddy.

Yondu

 


Sometimes, The Thing You've Been Looking For Your Whole Life Is Right There By Your Side All Along.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


You wanna get to him, you go through us! Or more accurately... We go through you!

Rocket Raccoon

 


You said it yourself, B****. We're the Guardians of the Galaxy.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Gamora: I'm a warrior, an assassin. I don't dance.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: Really? Well, on my planet, we have a legend about people like you. It's called Footloose. And in it, a great hero, named Kevin Bacon, teaches an entire city full of people with sticks up their butts that, dancing, well, is the greatest thing there is.

Gamora: ...Who put the sticks up their butts?

 


We Are Groot.

Groot

 


Can you believe they call us criminals when he's assaulting us with that haircut?

Rocket Raccoon

 


If I had a blacklight, this would look like a Jackson Pollock painting.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Spare me your foul gaze woman!

Drax the Destroyer

 


I’ve had a lot of folks try to kill me over the years. I ain’t about to be brought down by a tree and a talking raccoon.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


That is the most real, authentic, hysterical laugh of my entire life, because that is not a plan!

Rocket Raccoon

 


Groot: I am Groot.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: Well that's just as fascinating as the first 89 times you told me that. What is wrong with Giving Tree here?

 


She just told everyone your deepest, darkest secret!...You must be so embarrassed!

Drax the Destroyer

 


Gamora: It's dangerous and illegal work, suitable only for outlaws.

Peter Quill: Well, I come from a planet of outlaws: Billy the Kid, Bonnie and Clyde, John Stamos.

 


I'm sorry I didn't do none of it right, but I'm damn proud you're my boy.

Yondu

 


HEY, HEY, HEY! That's mine! Hey, take those headphones off, right now!

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


You know it's a shame that it took the tragedy of losing Yondu to bring us all together again. But I think he would be proud knowing that we're back as a team.

Stakar Ogord

 


I for one am not going to stand by and watch as Ronan wipes out billions of innocent lives.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Xandar, you stand accused! Your wretched peace treaty will not save you now. It is the tinder on which you burn.

Ronan

 


Star-Lord/Peter Quill: It's how eyesight works, you stupid raccoon.

Rocket Raccoon: Don't call me a racoon!

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: I'm sorry. I took it too far. I meant trash panda.

 


You just wanna suck the joy outta everything!

Rocket Raccoon

 


Star-Lord/Peter Quill: So whaddaya think? Me and you, taking down scores, just like old times?

Yondu: You always had balls, son! That's why we kept you as a youngling!

 


Star-Lord/Peter Quill: You put your turd in my bed, I shave you.

Rocket Raccoon: Oh, it won't be my turd. It'll be Drax's.

Drax the Destroyer: [laughs] I have famously huge turds.

 

 

 

You're a good looking girl. You should try to be more nice to people.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Can we put the bickering on a hold until after we survive this massive space battle?

Gamora

 


Ronan: What are you doing?

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: I'm distracting you, you big turd blossom!

 


The beast's hide is too thick to be pierced from the outside. I must cut through it from the inside.

Drax the Destroyer

 


I can't believe I'm taking orders from a hamster.

Denarian Saal

 


Nova Prime Rael: The fate of 12 billion people is in your hands.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: Hold on a second, you're being serious right now?

 


I didn't mean to do a mutiny... They killed all my friends.

Kraglin

 


Yondu: It ain't healthy for a mammalian body to hop more than 50 jumps at a time.

Rocket Raccoon: I know that.

Yondu: We're about to do 700!

 


I've mastered the ability of standing so incredibly still that I become invisible to the eye.

Drax the Destroyer

 


What should we do next? Something good, something bad? Bit of both?

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Rocket Raccoon: What did the galaxy ever do for you? Why would you want to save it?

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: Because I'm one of the idiots who lives in it!

 


Korath the Pursuer: Star-Lord!

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: Finally!

 


Rhomann Dey: He said that he may be an... "a-hole". But he's not, and I quote, "100% a d*ck".

Nova Prime Rael: Do you believe him?

Rhomann Dey: Well, I don't know if I believe anyone is 100% a d*ck…

 


Quit smiling, ya idiot, you're supposed to be professional.

Rocket Raccoon

 


Star-Lord/Peter Quill: This is weird. We've got a Sovereign fleet approaching from the rear.

Gamora: Why would they do that?

Drax the Destroyer: Probably because Rocket stole some of their batteries.

Rocket Raccoon: Dude!

Drax the Destroyer: Right... He didn't steal some of those. I don't know why they're after us. What a mystery this is.

 


You know what they say..."You're out of luck until you've gone duck."

Howard the Duck

 


Star-Lord/Peter Quill: Yeah, I'll have to agree with the walking thesaurus on that one.

Drax the Destroyer: DO NOT ever call me a thesaurus.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: It's just a metaphor, dude.

 


Where's your wife, you old codger?

Rocket Raccoon

 


I am going to die surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy.

Gamora

 


Ronan: I only ask that you take this matter seriously.

Thanos: The only matter I do not take seriously, boy, is you. Your politics bore me! Your demeanor is that of a pouting child. And apparently you alienated my favorite daughter, Gamora. I shall honor our agreement, Kree, if you bring me the Orb. But return to me again empty handed and I will bathe the star-ways with your blood.

Nebula: Thanks, Dad. Sounds fair.

 


Well, I didn't ask to get made! I didn't ask to be torn apart and put back together over and over and turned into some little monster!

Rocket Raccoon

 


Gamora: Drax, why aren't you wearing one of Rocket's Aero-Rigs?

Drax the Destroyer: It hurts.

Gamora: Hurts?

Drax the Destroyer: I have sensitive nipples.

 


He's going to be pissed when he finds out I switched out the orb on him.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Rocket Raccoon: Well, supposedly, these bald bodies find you attractive, so maybe you could work out some sort of trade.

Gamora: You must be joking.

Rocket Raccoon: No, I really heard they find you attractive.

 


Nebula: Gamora, you've always been weak! You stupid, traitorous...

Drax the Destroyer: No one talks to my friends like that.

 


Whoa! Whoa. There must be some kind of peaceful resolution to this, fellas... or even a violent one where I'm standing over there.

Rocket Raccoon

 


Gamora: You own a planet and can destroy two dozen spaceships without a suit. What are you exactly?

Ego: I'm what's called a Celestial, sweetheart.

 


Out of the way, dumber smaller Groot!

Drax the Destroyer

 


Rocket Raccoon: I was cybernetically engineered to pilot a spacecraft.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: You were cybernetically engineered to be a douchebag!

 


That dude there. I need his prosthetic leg.

Rocket Raccoon

 


I ain't done nothing right in my whole life Rat. You gotta give me this.

Yondu

 


It's just... swords were your thing and guns were mine, but... I guess we're both doing guns now. I just didn't know that.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Well, dying is certainly better than having to live an entire life as a moronic sh*tbag who thinks 'Taserface' is a cool name.

Rocket Raccoon

 


So how about a round with the duck?

Howard the Duck

 


Gamora: You should have learned.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill: I don't learn. One of my issues.

 


You're smiling. And for a second, I got a warm feeling. But then it was ruined by those disgusting-ass teeth.

Rocket Raccoon

 


Drax the Destroyer: I like your knife, I'm keeping it.

Moloka Dar: That was my favorite knife.

 


Showtime, a-holes!

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Nebula: I'm hungry. Hand me some of that yaro root.

Gamora: No. It's not ripe yet... and I hate you.

 


We're just like Kevin Bacon.

Gamora

 


What is your goal here? To get everyone to hate you? Because it's working.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


I live for the simple things... like how much this is going to hurt!

Yeah, writhe, little man.

Rocket Raccoon

 


If what's between my legs had a hand on it... I guarantee I could have landed this ship with it.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


You're an imbecile.

Drax the Destroyer

 


So here we are: a thief, two thugs, an assassin and a maniac. But we're not going to stand by as evil wipes out the galaxy. I guess we're stuck together, partners.

Star-Lord/Peter Quill

 


Yes! I have single-handedly vanquished the beast!

Draz the Destroyer

 


We're the fricking Guardians of the Galaxy!

Rocket Raccoon

 

So there we have it! Our ultimate list of Guardians of the Galaxy quotes. Did your favourite make the list? Here at Quality Comix, we have over 20 years of experience buying and selling vintage comic books. Thinking of selling some of your collection? You can find out what your comics are worth in our comic price guide, or if you’re interested in investing in more comics, feel free to browse through the comics we have in stock in our online store.